When It Is Time To Settle Down

Sad but true. We live in a world that glorifies men particularly (Black men) to be pimps, players, and macks.

A lot of guys think it is cool and would even give you props/respect if a man sleeps with multiple women.

A lot of women even grew to accept it and they think it is weird if a man says he is a one woman man.

Especially, if, he says he is practicing abstinence.

Women think he is either lying or he may be on the down low.

What is even sad nowadays. A lot of women think it is okay to sleep around with multiple men. They think men do it, why can't we?

Other women may think it is okay and some men would accept it.

Until they are ready to settle down and do you think they would choose a woman who gets around?

They would choose a woman they feel is virtuous and wifey material.

Can You Stand The Rain?

“On a perfect day, I know that I can count on you When that's not possible Tell me can you weather the storm?

'Cause I need somebody who will stand by me Through the good times and bad times She will always, always be right there

Sunny days, everybody loves them Tell me baby can you stand the rain?

Storms will come This we know for sure (This we know for sure) Can you stand the rain?” – New Edition (Can You Stand The Rain)?


It is raining here today. As, I listened to the rain this song popped in my head. This is one of my all-time favorite songs by New Edition.


When I heard this song as a youngster it did not really have a meaning to me. Until, I grew older and really listened to the lyrics.


In relationships and marriages our mate is usually there during good times but as the saying goes, “when the going gets tough, the tough get going.”


My mother always told me, you can tell who your real friends are when you are down. I believe this also applies to relationships or marriages.


Everyone wants that ride and die stick by your side mate. We all want that person who is going to stick it out with us and help us make it through.


When relationships or marriages go bad..... People say, did you see the red flags? You did not see how she or he really was?!


Love is blind: so we usually see the good and not the bad.


If we all just saw the bad there would always be rainy days instead of sunny days.


Question….

Can You Stand The Rain?

You Can't Separate A Fruit From It's Tree!!

The hospital scene from the movie Malcolm X https://youtu.be/5Uoy6xy5AFM

Today is Malcolm X aka El-Hajj Malik El-Shabazz, Celebration of Life (Birthday).

The first time, I ever heard of Malcolm X I was in the 8th grade. My assistant teacher in my social studies class. Noticed, I was a poor speller and I had poor hand writing.
She told me, when, I do my homework. I should use a dictionary to look up words that I did not know how to spell. She then told me about Malcolm X how he studied the dictionary and looked up every word in it. That he also wrote every word and their definition.

She asked me did I have a dictionary, I told her no and she got me one. I still have it until this day and just like Malcolm X. I made a attempt to study each word and write them all down along with their definitions.

Fast forward, several years later. Through a neighbor friend who end up joining the Nation of Islam while in prison. He introduced me to the teachings of the Nation of Islam. This was shortly before the movie Malcolm X came out.

I never visited the Nation of Islam mosque with my friend nor did I go see the movie. I was still clinging onto the world.

When I finally ordered the movie Malcolm X when it came on pay-per-view it blew my mind. Especially, the hospital scene and I regretted that I never visited the mosque. I contacted my friend and I told him I wanted to visit the mosque, he told me he would take me but he never did.

I forgot about the mosque until something tragic reminded me. Hopefully, I will share that a later time.

Back to Malcolm X. When I later became conscious and I read his autobiography. I was more impressed with him more than the movie.

I was hurt when he got put out the Nation of Islam but he was insubordinate to his teacher, (The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad) instructions. The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad instructed all his Ministers not speak on President John F. Kennedy assassination. Malcolm X was disobedient so he got silenced for 90 days for his comment the chickens coming home to roost.

While Malcolm X was on suspension he began speaking ill about his teacher, (The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad). Agents and hypocrites was feeding and promoting Malcolm X to go against his teacher.

The Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan joined the Nation of Islam in New York City and became a student of Malcolm X. He even joined the ministry class in New York City under Malcolm X and when The Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan moved back to Boston. It was Malcolm X who recommended that he be made the Minister there. The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad made Minister Louis Farrakhan the captain instead but he worked his way up.

Eventually, The Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan became the Minister of Boston and later in New York. Minister Louis Farrakhan and Malcolm X were good friends. But when Malcolm X started speaking ill about The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad, Minister Louis Farrakhan defended their teacher.

Some may ask, why would he defend The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad instead of Malcolm X? Even though, Malcolm X was Minister Louis Farrakhan teacher, The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad was both of their teacher.

It is just like Bruce Lee had his own students but Ip Man is their master (teacher). He is the one responsible for Bruce Lee.

I shared all that to say, even though, I love and respect Malcolm X as one of our greatest Black leaders. I do not like how people try to discredit his teacher (The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad).

Just like Bruce Lee became a good teacher, he had a teacher that made him good. The same way with Malcolm X.

Let us give honor and respect to Malcolm X without dishonoring and disrespecting his teacher. Because….

You can't separate a fruit from it's tree!!

Good Times

“Good times, any time you meet a payment!

Good times, any time you need a friend!

Good times, any time you're out from under!

Not getting hassled, not getting hustled
Keepin' your head above water!

Making a wave when you can!

temporary layoffs - good times!

Easy credit rip-offs - good times!

Scratchin' and survivin' - good times!

Hangin' in a chow line - good times!

Ain't we lucky we got 'em? good times!” – (Songwriters: Marilyn Bergman / Alan Bergman / Dave Grusin).

As a child, I always loved watching the TV show Good Times. Even as a child the show theme song did not make any sense to me.

I wondered…. How could struggling and surviving be Good Times?

Now, that, I am older and I am still maturing (smile). It makes a little more sense.

There is nothing more powerful than thought. With our thoughts we can create heaven, hell, peace, hostility, happiness, and sadness.

We can create Good Times with what we have and with the people around us.

If you watch the TV show Good Times, you will see the Evens family was poor but they did not allow their condition to bring them down and stop their ambition, goals, and dreams.

They made the best with what they had.

The Evens family lived in the ghetto/projects of Chicago. Where there was crimes, drugs, alcoholism, prostitution, teenage pregnancy, and gangs. But they did not become a product of their environment.

Thanks to the head of their house James Evens and his Queen (Florida Evans) sticking by his side. Together, they raised their three children and made their lives…. Good Times!!

A lot of Black people/African Americans grow up in some of the worst cities and towns in America. But they do not lose hope. Even though it seems like there is none.

Just like the Evens family rather they have a father in the house or being raised in a single parent home with their mother.

They are making the best out of their lives and making memories….

Good Times!!




Reference

Source: LyricFind Good Times lyrics © Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, Warner Chappell Music, Inc

Where Did The Image Of D - Holmez Come From?

My Allah (God) be pleased with Andre Harrell. I just wanted to share with you all where the ideal/image of my look as D - Holmez came from.

Years ago, before, I got into rapping. I wanted to be a singer and start a singing group similar to New Edition.

When I seriously go into rapping by then I became conscious (I joined the Nation of Islam).

Originally, I wanted to wear a suit and bowtie and fully represent the Nation of Islam. But some Brothers, (FOI) suggested, I keep it under cover and allow people to find out through my music.

I remembered, Dr. Jeckyll and Mr. Hyde from the movie Krush Groove and L. L. Cool J who is one of my all-time favorite rappers. So, I took their images.

The suit and the hat to make people think, I was going to sing then spit some conscious rap.

This is where the image of D - Holmez came from. Plus it meant, I am a business man that came to do business!! :-)

Who Will Save Black Males?

It seems like every time I log on to social media. I learn another Black male been killed. As Black males, we not only have to face being killed by one of our own. We still have to deal with white supremacists and disgruntled police officers.

A stray dog has a better chance at surviving the streets of America. A lot people think time has changed and things have gotten better.

Things may have changed for those particular people or some of them might be in denial. As a Black man, I see things as they are. The same!!

For every problem there is a solution. I have some solutions in mind which I care not to share. I rather have you all share your thoughts.

As I end this blog for I really do not have much to say. I shared a few pictures of some Black males that have been killed over the years and some of their killers are still walking around freely.

I end with a question as food for thought: Who Will Save Black males?

God and Me

I just would like to let you all know my blogs are like songs or poetry they are inspired. This blog was inspired by the Coronavirus (COVID-19). What it has been causing as for as shelter in place, us having to be quarantined, and the loss of lives.

I lost one of my high school teammates and it is believed that he died from the Coronavirus because he had similar symptoms. There are other people that I did not personally know but I learned they died from the Coronavirus, one of them happen to be the Student Minister of New York City, Student Minister Abdul Hafeez Muhammad. He was truly loved and admired by the believers in his mosque and the community.

I was falling into depression and I was getting stressed out. After learning about these deaths and seeing more people dying on my timeline on Facebook my depression grew even stronger. I could not sleep, and I cried more in my life than I recall. I began thinking about my daughters and other members of my family wondering would I see them again?

I began to think about all the things I wanted to do, the things I desired, and the things I do not have. I began to think about me being single and how I did not want to die alone. I live in Dallas, Texas and most of my family is in California and my daughters all live in different states from me.

I tried to share how I was feeling to a few people but it seemed before I could open and say how I was thinking and feeling. They began sharing their thoughts and feelings. If I did get someone to listen, I felt my words were taken out of context. So, I began to shelter myself from talking to people.

I saw, I was not sleeping and when I did finally sleep. I was sleeping 10 to 12 hours. I googled signs of depression – little interest of pleasure in doing things, feeling down, depressed, or hopeless, trouble falling or staying asleep, or sleeping too much, feeling tired or having little energy, poor appetite, overeating, or considerable weight changes, feeling bad about yourself – that you are a failure or have a lot of guilt, difficulty concentrating on a thing or making a decision, moving or speaking slowly, so that other people have noticed, or being so restless that you’ve been moving around a lot, thoughts that you be better off dead, or of hurting yourself in some way (Trintellix vortioxetine n. d.).

I thought about contacting my old therapist. But something put it on my heart to turn to the source. I know some people that are reading this blog may not believe in God, we are all entitled to our own opinions and I once was atheist but like Saul who later became Paul, I saw the light. This blog is not about religion, I am just sharing what I was experiencing in hopes to help others.

So, I turned to God, I began praying and fasting. I decided God is the only and the best person I could talk to during this time. I deactivated my Facebook page, I decided not to read articles about this epidemic, and I decided when I do talk to people. I would strive to keep our conversation positive. And if the person is negative, I would let the person know, and I will tell the person to let us strive to keep our conversation uplifting and encouraging or not talk at all.

This crisis showed me the only person I can really call on and depend on is God and Me.

I hope you all find some good out of this blog and I encourage you all if you need assistance. Sit your pride to the side and call a therapist if needed.

Reference

Trintellix vortioxetine (n. d.). Discussing your symptoms. Check. Retrieved from https://www.us.trintellix.com